Millennial Mom Shares 8 Ways She Parents “Like It’s 1985”

Parenting styles have definitely changed since we were kids. Most of us are trying to break those toxic cycles that we were stuck in as kids (diet culture, time-outs, etc) and pave our own way when it comes to raising our kids because, let’s face it, there’s a lot that our parents got wrong. But what did they get right?

One mom found that there are actually several parenting tricks from the 1980s that she uses every single day in 2025, and honestly, they’re pretty great.

“Time to rewind 40 years,” Vanessa Jennings wrote in her caption.

1. She doesn’t buy her kids a lot of stuff.

“Presents are for birthdays and Xmas 😆 they just don’t need loads of toys and need to learn the value of being gifted something,” she wrote.

There is something to be said about how kids being grateful for things has changed since we were kids. Growing up, I got presents on birthdays and holidays, and that was about it. I am very guilty of giving my daughter a lot more than I ever did, and yes, sometimes I wonder if I am doing her a disservice and desensitizing her how special things like that can be.

2. She teaches them resilience.

“I was brought up in New Zealand in the 80’s & my god, today’s snowflake generation would not know what hit them 😂 There are definitely winners & losers, it’s part of life. If you fall down, you gotta get back up. During my childhood there was a lot of love but if you weren’t bleeding profusely or you’d lost a limb, you were expected to just get on with it 😆 (although I’m not THAT harsh🤣) 🙅‍♀,” she jokes.

3. She seriously limits screentime.

The OP explains, “They generally only go on them for an hour at the weekend (and that’s usually only when we have something to get done), hardly ever during the week.” This rule is one that several millennial parents have adopted due to recent data and studies that have come out about screen time, social media, and kids, but maybe not to this extreme.

4. No video games.

“Between the TV/Netflix and the occasional use of tablets that’s enough kids technology for me! 📱” she clarified.

5. No smartphones.

Similar to her screentime rules, no phones will be handed out on a kid’s 11th or 12th birthday.

“The evidence is overwhelming – they’re so so damaging to the mental health and development of kids. They’re addictive enough for us adults as it is,” she wrote.

6. She prefers the kids not to wear shoes outside.

Though she understands that this rule probably has something to do with growing up in New Zealand, she thinks that having the kids rub some grass between their toes will help them stay grounded.

“Probably another product of growing up in New Zealand (my Irish husband is horrified when they don’t wear shoes 😂), but I think it’s important to be close to nature and feel the freedom of grass under your feet,” she says.

7. She lets her kids be bored.

“If they don’t experience boredom, they don’t get the opportunity to be really creative – my Mum has always said ‘inspiration is on the other side of boredom!’ And I wholeheartedly agree,” she explained.

8. She doesn’t stress over their eating habits.

She explains, “We encourage them to try new things and their taste buds are still developing – I grew up on sausage rolls and fairy bread but now love mushrooms, salmon and kimchi. There’s time to expand their palates.”

After her post gained traction, Vanessa received some mixed feedback.

“Imagine being an adult and calling children snowflakes and thinking that’s okay. They’re children. They’re going to have big emotions. They’re supposed to have big emotions. That’s part of their brain development. You’re supposed to be their safe space for them to express that, and learn to deal with it. Not go on the internet and call literal children snowflakes,” one user complained.

Another said, “I let my daughter play alone. I can’t be playing with her all the time – I can’t be a constant source of entertainment. And when I was young (80s/90s) I can’t recall my parent playing with me at all!!”

“I love this. Honestly it’s why we are different. I try to limit to screen time to the weekend only also and like you said only if something needs to get done and totally agree they need to build resilience life won’t always be easy but they can’t just give up. Something I tell my kids all the time,” another said.

Also, when the OP said she was time-traveling back to 40 years ago, I was sure she was mistaken but…alas, she’s right! Where does the time go?!