My Compass for Life’s Greatest Adventure, Boundless Parenting

My Compass for Life’s Greatest Adventure, Lessons from Boundless Parenting

Ben Greenfield is a speaker and New York Times bestselling author of 17 books, including popular titles Beyond Training, Boundless, Fit Soul, Spiritual Disciplines Journal and the Boundless Cookbook. A former collegiate tennis, water polo and volleyball player, bodybuilder, 13-time Ironman triathlete and professional obstacle course racer, Ben has been voted by the NSCA as America’s top Personal Trainer and by Greatist as one of the top 100 Most Influential People In Health And Fitness.

Below, Ben shares how he parents. Views are his own.

Picture two very different futures for your grandchildren.

In one, they’re vibrant and grounded, living close to nature, with strong bodies, resilient minds, and a sense of purpose that drives how they raise their own kids.

In the other, they’re overstimulated and under-inspired, constantly plugged into screens, living lives of quiet distraction, and unknowingly repeating the same patterns.

This vision haunts me, not in a doom-and-gloom kind of way, but as a powerful reminder that the choices we make as parents today ripple far beyond our own lifetimes. That’s what led me to write Boundless Parenting.

After years of experimenting, failing, learning, and most importantly, listening to other incredible parents from all walks of life, I decided to create the ultimate guidebook for raising free-thinking, impactful, joyful humans. What I’ve discovered is simple, parenting isn’t just something you do, it’s a calling. It’s the greatest adventure you’ll ever take.

Am I Paying Attention to the Right Things?

Like many parents, I often ask myself those quiet questions in the middle of the night,
‘Am I being a good dad? Am I modeling the right values? Am I truly present, or just performing parenthood on autopilot?’

I’m raising twin boys, River and Terran, who are now fifteen. And while I’m proud of the young men they’re becoming, I’d be lying if I said I had all the answers. What I do have is a framework, what I call a compass, that’s guided my parenting choices. It’s built on autonomy, love, legacy, and presence.

Love and Logic in Action

If there’s one parenting philosophy that’s shaped my approach the most, it’s Love and Logic. I first came across this concept through the work of Foster Cline and Jim Fay. It resonated immediately because it encourages children to make their own choices, and learn from natural consequences.

In our home, we don’t have strict screen time rules, banned foods, or enforced bedtimes. Instead, we equip our sons with knowledge. We talk about what sugar does to the body, how blue light affects sleep, how procrastination plays out in the real world. And then, we let them decide. Sometimes they get it ‘right,’ sometimes they learn the hard way. But that’s the point.

This method mirrors what I’ve seen in Indigenous cultures, like the Sámi people of the Arctic, where kids are given trust and responsibility from a young age. Autonomy isn’t just a luxury, it’s a training ground for life.

Creating Space Through Outsourcing

Here’s something that might surprise you, especially if you think intentional parenting has to mean doing everything yourself. I outsource a lot. And I’m not ashamed of it.

Why? Because time is my most valuable resource. If having a groundskeeper or virtual assistant means I can spend more uninterrupted time hiking with my boys, cooking meals with them, or talking about their passions, then it’s worth every penny.

Even if outsourcing isn’t financially possible right now, there are ways to get creative. Could a family member help with school runs? Could you batch-cook to free up a few nights a week? Parenting with intention doesn’t mean doing it all alone. It means choosing what matters most, and protecting time for it.

Why We Chose Unschooling

Education has been one of the biggest decisions we’ve made as a family. We considered homeschooling, but found that most systems just replicate the same outdated model, preparing kids to be compliant, not curious.

So we gave our sons a choice, and they chose unschooling.

Unschooling isn’t about chaos or lack of structure. It’s about following a child’s interests and building a learning environment around them. Right now, River and Terran are studying crypto, non-profits, hydroponics, and beekeeping. Their ‘school day’ might include goat milking, writing, workouts, reading, and meditation. It’s dynamic, rigorous, and most importantly, it’s theirs.

If you’re curious about this path, I highly recommend Unschooling to University by Judy Arnall and my podcast episode with her. This journey has allowed my sons to develop resilience, curiosity, and a true love of learning.

Rituals Over Rules

While we give our boys freedom, we also anchor them with rituals. These are the rhythms that keep us grounded, morning meditation, evening storytelling, family dinners, adventures outdoors, and meaningful holiday traditions. They provide predictability, safety, and connection.

One of our most profound experiences as a family was sending River and Terran on a five-day wilderness rite of passage. Alone in nature, without phones or comforts, they faced themselves and came out transformed. I cried more than once that day. It reminded me that parenting is about preparing them to stand tall, even when we’re not there to catch them.

Parenting as Legacy

Ultimately, Boundless Parenting is about legacy. Not the kind you leave in a bank account, but the one etched into your children’s character, values, and sense of purpose.

This book brings together voices from across the world, parents who are doing things differently and courageously. It’s a field guide, a survival manual, and a love letter to conscious parenting.

If you’ve ever felt unsure about whether you’re, ‘doing it right,’ or you’re simply craving a deeper connection with your children, I wrote this book for you.

Let’s raise kids who are curious, grounded, and capable of navigating a wild world with wisdom. Let’s model health, wholeness, and humility. And let’s remember that our greatest adventure isn’t something we have to plan for.

It’s already happening, every moment, every conversation, every meal, every bedtime story.

Want to Learn More?

Boundless Parenting is available on my website or Amazon. You can also dive deeper through my podcast or audiobook, where Jessa and I share our full story and practical tips you can use at home right away.

I will also be speaking at the Health Optimisation Summit (https://uk.healthoptimisation.com), the top Biohacking Conference which returns for its fifth edition in London on 13th/14th September, bringing together leading experts, visionaries, and enthusiasts to explore the latest innovations, trends, and strategies in human health and performance. 

Let’s raise the next generation not just with rules, but with intention, joy, and boundless love.